Some Random Thoughts

Certain things smell terrible when you burn them. Examples are plastic, hair, and random signs that are burnt in the dorm fireplace with the flue closed. Other things don't smell bad, but I can't seem to think of any of them at this late hour.

I like beef. It tastes very good. Unfortunately, it contains high amounts of cholesterol and is relatively unhealthful (I believe that that is the right term, as healthy implies its own state of being, but I could be totally wrong about the whole thing).

Nalgene bottles are ridiculously strong. I played baseball with one a few years back and it didn't break. I guess that it wasn't really baseball, but rather just hitting a nalgene bottle as hard as I could with a baseball bat. The point is still relevant however, because the bottle stayed intact.

A ficus makes a room considerably more friendly. Vegetation in general makes things seem more hospitable. It's because everybody likes nature, and domesticating the nature to suit your home makes everybody like you. (It totally doesn't work like that, but we'll leave that statement just because I don't feel like deleting it now, and would rather just write a long explanation for my stupid sentence.)

Airplane "In Case of Emergency" announcements are underrated. Nobody pays attention to them (including myself) because everybody's seen them too many times. The flight attendants' routine is quite amusing, though, and worth imitating to amuse the people sitting around you. You can also pay rapt attention through the presentation and ask lots of annoying questions, just to piss everybody off. (I've never done this, but it seems like a good idea.)

Santa Claus is a stalker. He sees you when you're sleeping and knows when you're awake. He knows if you've been bad or good. I mean YOU, by the way. You, the person reading this now. Specific to you. He doesn't know this about anybody else, but has chosen you because you chose to read this blog.

It would really suck if the shit hit the fan. There would be fecal matter all over the place. It would take some serious carpet shampooing and wall scrubbing to get the poop out and I expect the smell would remain.

Moses was probably ripped. I feel like it probably takes some serious muscle to part a sea. He also supposed his toes were roses. They weren't actually roses. He supposed erroneously.

Goldfish shouldn't be smiling back at you. They're about to be eaten. If I knew that I was created with the sole purpose of being eaten later in my life, I would not have a permanent smile plastered on my face.

Tattoos are a dumb idea. Most of the time, you get old and wrinkly and they look really bad and you regret youthful mistakes. This is particularly important for people who get tattoos in awkward places like their biceps, which look like garbage when the muscle tone is gone. Also when the tattoos have no particular significance to the people.

Rain is severely under appreciated. It feels really good if you don't mind being cold, and it provides water for the vegetation and for us to drink. It also makes things smell good, (which is actually kind of gross, because that pleasant smell is funguses releasing their spores,) and makes puddles to jump in.

That's all. I just logged some of my more random thoughts from the past few minutes. Hope you enjoyed it. Don't particularly know why you would read it in the first place, but if you did, I hope it didn't bore you too much. Santa's watching, so pretend you liked it even if you didn't.