There're Monsters Under My Bed

Not in a literal sense. Or maybe in a literal sense, but then they're invisible and silent and don't actually do anything bad and move out of the way when I put things under my bed. There're very polite, invisible, silent monsters under my bed who don't really try to scare me. Kind ninja monsters.

Anyway in a metaphorical sense, I'm not really sure what I mean. I started writing this with some kind of idea of what I meant about monsters, but I forgot what my metaphorical monsters were. So, I don't have any anymore. Or if I do, they're also polite, invisible, silent ninja monsters.

Ninjas are awesome. Except that they kill people. I would generally consider killing people to be wrong, or at least something that you shouldn't do on a regular basis. Ninjas kill people on a fairly regular basis, since most of them (I would assume) are assassins, and assassins kill people. Using the logical reasoning skills that I've learned this year, I can reason that since killing people is wrong, and ninjas kill people, killing is ninjas. It's called modus ponens or something like that.

Your parents tell you to do awful things as a child because they "build character." It's a cliché we've all seen on television and in comic strips (Calvin and Hobbes comes to mind). It's also a huge lie. You know those things that are supposed to build character? Yeah? Well they turn harmless children into jaded, sociopathic adults liable to jaywalk and commit homicides. By the way I just realized that Calvin and Hobbes were named after famous thinkers, which makes sense because Calvin and Hobbes is a surprisingly deep comic, in addition to being hilarious.

So right about now I'm not too motivated to write about philosophy. It's also pretty windy. Those two thoughts don't really have anything to do with each other. I'm kind of hungry. Yeah, it's really windy. Yeah anyway I'm kind of off topic at this point.

So the monsters under my bed are those nagging thoughts in the back of my head telling me to do work, and to do all those other things that I should probably do. They're the things I should do but don't want to do, or don't know how to do, or am afraid to do. They're my nervousness and my hesitation. And they're not under my bed. They on my pillow, whispering in my ear when I'm trying to sleep.

You have more nostrils than noses. So do I. What a novel idea.