Woosh

Woosh is the sound that things make when they go flying over my head. Not too many things fly over my head, but when they do, that's the sound they make. Things that do fly over my head include frisbees, airplanes, and physics lectures.

I've come to the conclusion that I really don't care about electricity or magnetism. Equations that describe the charge flowing through a closed circuit don't have any practical application in my normal life. Being lectured about them is not amusing.

People are troublesome. They are troublesome because they think, and you can't know what they're thinking. The world would be a much simpler place if people could tell what other people were thinking. Omniscience would be pretty nice, in that way.

Omnipotence would be so much fun. You could do whatever you wanted. Literally. I would make a really good pie and eat it. Pie is wonderful. There are many wonderful things. Puppies are one of them. Rainbows are also nice. Sex is pretty good too. Pie and sex is a combination I have yet to try, but it's going pretty high on my list of Things To Do Once I'm Omnipotent.

Confusion can be fun. But only in extremes and when it doesn't really matter if you know what's going on. I haven't been that confused in a long time.

Performance art is underrated. I think there should be more performance artists. Like mimes. People make fun of mimes, but they're actually really awesome. They seem to congregate in large cities and tourist traps. It is rather unfortunate, because I think that I would enjoy seeing a person dancing like a robot on a side street in a small town.

Clothing is too complicated. There are lots of variations on four basic things, and people fail to see that. These four basic things are: shoes, pants, shirts and hats. There is no reason to make it more complicated than that. Dresses are long shirts. Skirts are one-legged pants. Hoodies are shirts with hats attached to them. By combining forces, these four clothing items can for the ultimate garment. The Footy Pajama (with a hood, of course).

I want a narrator for my life. An omniscient third person observer. And I want them to narrate my life in my head, so I know what's going on. It'd be even crazier if when I was doing something boring, he would launch into another dialogue like, "Meanwhile, a storm was brewing in the dormitory..."

Cut-off jeans should make a comeback. That's not just my personal opinion. That's a fact.